1. As I said before, I am feeling pain at a deeper level regarding my dreams, calling, church, etc.
2. I was looking to someone else to provide me with answers and resolution when I should have been clinging to Jesus (I recently met someone for the first time whose story greatly parallels mine).
As I reflected on my identity as both broken and beloved in Christ this morning, I was reminded that these chaotic, overwhelming realities in my life can find their home in Christ. Indeed, only He is big enough for all of it. I may not have resolution for my pain or my calling, but it is enough to find myself in Him. His grace is sufficient for me as he holds me in his arms.
Read this this morning from Hebrews 6:18-20
"so that by two unchangeable things, in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have fled for refuge might have strong encouragement to hold fast to the hope set before us. We have this as a sure and steadfast anchor of the soul, a hope that enters into the inner place behind the curtain, where Jesus has gone as a forerunner on our behalf, having become a high priest forever after the order of Melchizedek." (ESV)
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