Sunday, August 31, 2014

St. Aidan Compline

I first experienced this compline as I listened to an audio recording from one of Renovare’s “With-God Life” conference sessions from 2005. I was deeply impacted by it, as I’ve tried various means to place my sleep in the arms of God.

I have sought these means mainly because I typically wake up very restless and afraid, feeling very dark inside. It takes a while for hope and peace to take possession of my mind and heart, usually as a result of much concerted effort and time spent in Psalm 23.

St. Aidan died this day (August 31) in A.D. 651, so I thought it fitting to post this today. May it bless your sleep, “for he grants sleep to those he loves.” (Ps 127:2 NIV)

Google defines Compline as “a service of evening prayers forming part of the Divine Office of the Western Christian Church, traditionally said (or chanted) before retiring for the night.”

I also love the fact that the compline uses some of my favorite words from the Psalms:

I lie down and sleep;
I wake again, because the Lord sustains me.
(Ps 3:5 ESV)

In peace I will lie down and sleep,
for you alone, Lord,
make me dwell in safety.
(Ps 4:8 NIV)

Taken from the Northumbria Community website.


If this Compline is being used in a group setting the * notation indicates a change of reader; words in bold are said all together; words in bold italic are said by each person in turn; and + indicates where you might make the sign of the cross.

+ (silently)

* O Christ, Son of the living God,
may Your holy angels guard our sleep,
may they watch over us as we rest
and hover around our beds.

* Let them reveal to us in our dreams
visions of Your glorious truth,
O High Prince of the universe,
O High Priest of the mysteries.

* May no dreams disturb our rest
and no nightmares darken our dreams.
May no fears or worries delay
our willing, prompt repose.

* May the virtue of our daily work
hallow our nightly prayers.
May our sleep be deep and soft
so our work be fresh and hard.

I will lie down and sleep in peace
for You alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety.

My dear ones, O God, bless Thou and keep,
in every place where they are.

* Into Your hands I commit my spirit;
I give it to You with all the love of my heart.

* How precious to me are Your thoughts, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!
Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand.
When I awake, I am still with You.

I make the cross of Christ upon my breast,
+ over the tablet of my hard heart,
and I beseech the Living God of the universe -
may the Light of Lights come
to my dark heart from Thy place;
may the Spirit’s wisdom come to my heart’s tablet
from my Saviour.

* Christ without sin, Christ of wounds,
I am placing my soul and my body
under Thy guarding this night,
Christ of the poor, Christ of tears.
Thy cross be my shielding this night,
O Thou Son of tears, of the wounds, of the piercing.

I am going now into the sleep:
O be it in Thy dear arm’s keep,
O God of grace, that I shall awake.

* My Christ! my Christ!
my shield, my encircler,
each day, each night,
each light, each dark.

* My Christ! my Christ!
my shield, my encircler,
each day, each night,
each light, each dark.
Be near me, uphold me,
my treasure, my triumph.

Circle me, Lord,
keep protection near
and danger afar.

* Circle me, Lord,
keep light near
and darkness afar.

* Circle me, Lord,
keep peace within;
keep evil out.

The peace of all peace
be mine this night
+ in the name of the Father,
and of the Son,
and of the Holy Spirit.

Saturday, August 30, 2014

Some Pilgrim Thoughts on Silence

From my journal entry on 8/26/14:

“Command me to be silent and still before You, Lord;

quiet me in Your love.”

My mind (thought, feeling) is the first and strongest place that my attempt to “make things happen” shows up – because of the close proximity of the mind with the will. My mind presents options to the will for choice, and the will relies on the mind for available options.

To quiet the mind, really, is to let go of the burden of making things happen and to open up to receiving the life that God is giving, the life that I’m becoming.

Thanksgiving attends this receiving, naturally and organically, just as frustration, lust and anger attend attempts to make a life for myself.

The will and mind are healed as they are freed from making things happen. Freed from the burden of securing provision, security and significance, the mind and will are free to consider and choose what is good, beautiful and true (will of God).

Silence and stillness are food and drink to the burden weary soul, restoring the mind and will with endless life.

Carrying a Living Silence

“We need also times of silent waiting, alone, when the busy intellect is not leaping from problem to problem, and from puzzle to puzzle. If we learn the secret of carrying a living silence in the center of our being we can listen on the run. The listening silence can become intertwined with all our inward prayers. A few moments of relaxed silence, alone, every day, are desperately important. When distracting noises come, don’t fight against them, do not elbow them out, but accept them and weave them by prayer into the silence.” (Thomas Kelly, The Sanctuary of the Soul, in A Guide to Prayer (Upper Room Books, 2013), p.293).

I read this quote from Thomas Kelly several weeks ago as I was trying to recover from the noise and turmoil of air travel (we flew to Oregon to visit family). I only fly every 1-2 years and it’s usually a stressful event filled with anxiety. It feels so noisy, chaotic and out of control, and it usually triggers deep fears in me of being on my own without the resources I need. This is not actually true, but my body thinks and acts as if it is, because of experiences I’ve had in the past. I’ve found some practices over the years that have helped provide space for the grace of God to access these wounded parts of my soul. Times of silence, stillness and listening prayer have been essential to the deep inner healing that I need. Thankfully, anxiety levels have dropped significantly over the past few years as a result.

For the first few days after travelling when I closed my eyes I could only see and hear the noise and bustle of travellers. Airports and airplanes are filled with many stressed and busy people, often in a hurry and irritable (myself included!) One of the first things I do when travelling is try to find a place where I will be able to be quiet and alone in the early mornings. I have found this essential to my sanity and peace.

“There should be at least a room, or some corner where no one will find you and disturb you or notice you. You should be able to untether yourself from the world and set yourself free, loosing all the fine strings and strands of tension that bind you, by sight, by sound, by thought, to the presence of other men.” (Thomas Merton, New Seeds of Contemplation)

After a few failed attempts, I found a rhythm that worked for me. As I settled into a safe place and time, I began to be able to calm the voices and still the images. By God’s gentle invitation and provision, I entered into stillness and silence, trying to keep my focus on him alone. I could listen and receive.

I greatly desired to experience the “living silence” that Kelly speaks of that I could carry with me amidst the busyness of sight-seeing and conversations with family. At times I felt a reservoir of peace that I could access when out and about. A trip to the restroom, a silent moment in between sights and conversations, provided me an opportunity to reconnect with this living silence within me. It helped solidify my soul and keep me centered, at least somewhat. Continual attention to the fount of silence in the mornings renewed the reservoir.

There were many times, however, when it didn’t “work,” and I felt just as frazzled and restless as ever. I tried not to linger on these too much, but try again when I felt up to it. I think it’s something I can continue to grow in, and I think it’s something that makes Jesus smile, which is good enough for me!