Borrowing Faith

I’ve been feeling despair more strongly the past few days. I wonder, as I feel a deeply painful lack of hope, what does Jesus think of me? I have no sense of purpose in life, no “calling,” and feel like a complete failure as a Dad, husband, as a disciple. My only hope is that Jesus is carrying me when I can’t walk. Every other Christian I know seems to have some sense of their purpose, that they’re heading in a certain direction, even if it brings pain. They can draw on their purpose for strength during trying times. I wonder what must be wrong with me if I don’t feel that at all.

These words from Bebo Norman’s (I like his stuff, but can’t stand his name) song “Borrow Mine” are helpful, and it turns out, my only hope today. I hope this is Jesus’ perspective.

Take my hand and walk with me a while
Cause it seems your smile has left you
And don't give in, when you fall apart
And your broken heart has failed you
I'll set a light up
On a hilltop
To show you my love
For this world to see

You can borrow mine
When your hope is gone
Borrow mine
When you can't go on
'Cause the world will not defeat you
When we're side by side
When your faith is hard to find
You can borrow mine

Take my love when all that you can see
Is the raging sea all around us
And don't give up 'cause I'm not letting go
And the God we know will not fail us
We'll lay it all down
As we call out
Sweet Savior
help our unbelief

You can borrow mine
When your hope is gone
Borrow mine
When you can't go on
'Cause the world will not defeat you
When we're side by side
When your faith is hard to find
You can borrow mine

When you are weak
Unable to speak
You are not alone
The God who has saved us
Will never forsake us
he's coming to take us
Take us to our home

You can borrow mine
When your hope is gone
Borrow mine
When you can't go on
'Cause the world will not defeat you
When we're side by side
When your faith is hard to find
When your faith is hard to find
You can borrow mine

Take my hand
Take my love
Don't give in
Don't give up